DJ Jefferz

PSA: (Sorry extremely long TLDR) But explains quite abit.

For those who may have seen my statuses recently where I have been rude, sarcastic and generally negative. 

I'll be honest and explain some things. I was kicked back in June for "Misconduct". From there I completely lost all faith in TMP due to the fact after some simple digging and investigation that some of the reasons weren't 100% legitimate. Things I can not discuss as I think it would be classed as an ISP breach.

From there for about a month I was continuously picked on by TMP staff over a period of 4-6 weeks. In that period I received about 5 punishments which ALL were removed for being unjustified. Saying this was just human mistakes is not true. At the same time I was involved in alot of toxicity within the community. This lead me to be so angered and upset I actually suffered a mental breakdown. I was diagnosed with depression and anxiety and was prescribed pills to treat this.

I have since tried to regain confidence in myself and rebuild the relations in the community. In the early stages I was still quite negative and because of my anxiety I became extremely paranoid and afraid of TMP. I avoided playing the Multiplayer client for a long time because I was afraid of being watched by staff who may be out to get me because of the previous punishments. I did become quite hated by staff as all I did was be negative and nasty.

In this time I also had spoken to @_J-M and @Scar in a chat and clarified a few things and sorted some issues out. This regained alot of trust and I felt the chat was quite constructive. I declared at the time my intentions were to return to the team and quite rightly I understood I needed to work on this before I was considered to return. I started making posts at the start of September in the help section and began working on the forum to show activity and my attitude had changed.

However, things from TMP have kind of returned back to how they were. Where Staff are picking on me or singling me out to make me look small or to make me feel like an idiot. For example a Community Manager continuously deletes anything I post on their statuses even if it's nothing harmful, archives posts without explanation or a real logical reason and then when I confront them about it they go reporting it to higher staff EG Devs to then get them to back this particular Community Manager and censor the things I say. Other staff speak to me like I'm dog poo on the bottom of their shoe and have a complete disrespect. All this because they think I'm in the wrong for being removed from the team when admittedly TMP agreed it was NOT handled correctly and following I was not treated properly.

So in the recent weeks this once again has made me angry as I have changed but yet I feel like TMP has made false promises. So quite rightly I have been making rude, sarcastic and nasty posts and comments as I feel it'd not equal how I'm being treated again. 

I recently asked to return to the support team as I felt I had improved and was doing alot better. It looked promising and I was really hoping it would work out. However, I was again declined because of my past history and recent posts. In all fairness I understand the recent ones happened and a majority of the posts were deleted by me within a few minutes of being posted because I realised that it wasn't nice to be posting. In addition as part of the return the previous manager is questioned about this. What I don't think is fair is that the ex-manager is entitled to an opinion when TMP has said it was not handled correctly and I have proven that it was not a legitimate kick. This manager quite clearly did not want me in the team and did everything to kick me. So why when they clearly have a personal issue with me they are entitled to give TMP their opinion on my return? Obviously if someone doesn't like you their going to stick with their opinion of no return regardless of my improvements.

All of this doesn't help me in health when your speaking to staff who ignore you, tell you your not good enough and constantly try to heckle you. It's an awful way to treat people.

So that's the story. Sorry for the TLDR but if anyone cares in TMP staff they might reconsider their approach to my situation when it comes to it. I really hope to return but I really wish I wasn't seen as the annoying troll that people keep saying I am.